BONERS?!?!?!

 I get a lot of questions about erections. Like Is it normal? How to prevent them? I'm scared I'll get one? OK, I'm here to clear some things up. I don't have a penis, but the guys I have talked to say that for the most part an erection can be controlled, as long as they are awake and of an age over 21.

 On average, a man has between 3-6 erections a night while they sleep. With a massage, if a man falls asleep more often then not, an erection happens. This should not embarrass anyone since this is natural in perfect relaxation (sleep) HOWEVER this is NOT normal if the man is awake UNLESS there is some kind of medical condition.

 If you are that concerned about getting a stiffy during a massage just let the therapist know you just want your backside done, this way you never have to flip over. Now if you are looking for something extra DON'T. Do you know how long it takes to go to school for massage?  And NO, not one legit therapist will risk their license to do something more!!!!!  We pay THOUSANDS of dollars to go to school and if caught we can NEVER work in the industry EVER again. It's easier and cheaper to find a hooker willing to give you that extra that you want. So don't bother looking for it through a Licensed Massage Therapist. If you do, the session will end, you will be escorted out of the building, the police will be called, and you will be black listed by the company. So again, it's not worth it, just call an escort service if you want more than a massage.

No Creepy Guy, I do not want to go out with you.

 Hello, my name is Ginger and I have been a Licensed Massage Therapist for 10 years now. I come home everyday and tell my roommate all the crazy stories I experience during work and he suggested that I started blogging about them. Please forgive me if my sentences or any other grammar is incorrect, I am NOT a writer. 

Here is my first story I'll let you in on. last week I get a male client that comes in where I work and wants a good looking female therapist with "strong hands". When I greet the man he stands up and must be at least 6'5" and over 300 lbs. This does not intimidate me since I work on a lot of athletes, however his energy is very off putting. I mean the way he leans in to shake my hand and making small comments like how beautiful my hair is and that I look really healthy.

 Anyways we get into the massage room and I go through the schpeel,  do you have any areas you want me to work on, what is your preference on pressure, do you have any medical conditions. He keeps it short and clean, nothing out of the ordinary except if I do a good enough job he may ask me to marry him. 

So, I start the massage. I always start my client laying face down on the table so I can work on their back, since it is usually the most stressed. I use my elbow a lot for deep pressure so I can save my hands.  As I lean into the stroke on his back he lets a moan that is very disturbing almost skin crawling. I ask if he is alright and he says, "I haven't felt that way in such a long time". OK now I am officially getting creeped out. 
In my mind I'm praying, "LORD please help me". Then the man says,"OK why don't we go out tonight and you can work out some more kinks in my body". 

Now, here is the lesson I want to teach every female therapist or any woman that can't get away from an annoying male that won't give up. I told him he may want to talk to my husband, he's a lumberjack and always carries an axe with him. That man shut up so fast and the rest of the massage went fantastic. No more comments and no more moaning and I still got a wonderful tip. 

Stay tuned for more massage tips and stories.

 Heart Ya, Ginger